Guilty Expression :: Rants and raves inspired by a passionate, frustrated love for God.

Re: Sex for 1 (Score: 1)
by Alice (-) on Jan 04, 2005 - 05:55 PM

Here are my ideas:

Lust, in my opinion, can be defined as:

1). thinking about someone *purely* in sexual terms (and/or acting out on those thoughts)

2). thinking about someone in sexual terms when you are not in a relationship with them, and when the chances of you ever being in a relationship with them are unlikely. By sexual terms here, I don't mean 'finding someone attractive'; I mean imagining sexual scenarios. Porn, for example

by '*purely* in sexual terms' I mean thinking about someone only in conjunction with sex, i.e. not appreciating them for anything other than their ability (or imagined ability) to pleasure you sexually. Thus, 1) applies to those in a relationship. If the relationship is based purely on sex, then I believe it is lustful. If the relationship is based on things other than sex, i.e. love, respect, shared interests, then the sexual desires the people in that relationship have are not lustful. They are a normal part of a relationship. I believe that the only way people in a relationship can 'lust' after one another is if they view each other purely in terms of sex. If they don't then it's not lust, it is sexual desire, and I believe that sexual desire is acceptable for anyone in relationship to have, whether that relationship is a married one or a 'going out' one.

It's silly for people to say that you can't think of someone in a sexual way before you marry them 'because that's lust'. I mean, surely one of the reasons you marry someone (or enter a relationship with someone) is because you are sexually attracted to them. Not the major reason maybe, but still a fairly important reason.

As for masturbation...in my opinion it is absolutely not sinful...unless it is done in conjunction with using pornography or something. Masturbation is a fun, natural kind of thing to do.

I hope that makes some kind of sense.