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| darkly | Posted: 11.02.2003, 00:59 | |
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Is it all bollox? I'm having a real struggle with my faith. I think it might be all crap. I don't know what to think anymore, I love my Girlfriend but this I feel may e bigger than us. What should I do?? That may be a rhetorical question... Why do I feel like I have let (am letting) so may people down. I can think of 6 at least [APAPGJ]. Maybe I can work through this but at the mo I am not sure. Dx |
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| darkly | Posted: 11.02.2003, 01:01 | |
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Well that's posted now... no going back...   |
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| andy | Posted: 11.02.2003, 01:57 | |
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What should you do? Give me a call. (Not to be told how to sort it out, but so I can hear what's on your mind) People here will pray (I will anyway) and if God exists that might help... This is not about other people. |
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| andy | Posted: 11.02.2003, 01:57 | |
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And keep posting here whatever. All welcome no matter what. |
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| andy | Posted: 11.02.2003, 03:53 | |
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Everyone else is asleep and I'm still posting... By the way, although I think this can in no way account for our undulations in terms of faith and feeling God near, I do believe you may be experiencing "post-uni syndrome" even though you're still there. Maybe I should write an article about this, but basically _loads_ of people get seriously depressed/confused/lost in the year(s) after coming back from uni. People need to be warned, so they realise they're not abnormal. Just a thought - my first year after uni was a complete meltdown - I had the same kind of remote relationship worries and I also had a near complete crisis of faith - I felt God had disappeared from my life. Like he had done it deliberately, just withdrawn. |
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| darkly | Posted: 11.02.2003, 11:17 | |
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I have to get to lectures but I will talk to you soon, Dx |
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| davidb | Posted: 11.02.2003, 15:05 | |
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Thanks so much for your honesty in posting, D. I'm so sorry it's hard at the moment. Please know that I'm thinking of you and sympathising with you. I *often* go through these times when I want to chuck Christianity in as manifestly untrue. I can think of at least three times in the last three months alone. So I do sympathise. Feel free to get in touch if you think it might help. Warmest wishes, DavidB |
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| davidb | Posted: 11.02.2003, 15:14 | |
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By the way, I'm feeling sorry that I replied to your thoughts on sleeping in the same room today - I hadn't yet read your post worrying about Christianity. I expect the last thing you need at the moment is debate about secondary issues like that. Please forgive me, it was unintentional if it caused you upset or irritation. Warmest wishes, DavidB |
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| darkly | Posted: 11.02.2003, 19:43 | |
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i9'm pleased you did answer them in the order you did. I would not want you to regulate your response in any way... |
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| Midge | Posted: 12.02.2003, 00:21 | |
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I'm sorry you're feeling like this at the moment... I often feel like I've been fooling myself and all the sceptics I'm surrounded by are right after all and I should just go out and do all the things I've been restrained from etc. - and it scares me to think what being wrong might mean. Usually when I'm getting ill/exhausted/frustrated/depressed about anything else. But I just cling on to hoping that God will only let it go so far and He won't let me go, that just as me becoming a Christian was only possible by God's effort, so me staying a Christian up till now has only been possible by His effort, and so it doesn't depend on my own feebleness. I'll be praying for you. |
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| darkly | Posted: 12.02.2003, 01:29 | |
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All these reponeses are great but they all fail in a fundemental way. If you are feeling that God doesn't exist then trusting in him that everything will be okay is not only contraditory but foolish... |
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| andy | Posted: 12.02.2003, 01:36 | |
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That's why I didn't say that. However, it's worth trying to keep an open mind rather than making quick decisions. I'm sure you wouldn't anyway. |
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| Alice | Posted: 12.02.2003, 11:58 | |
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I hope you feel better about things soon, Darkly. I have a friend who's got quite a few doubts at the moment, too. It's really difficult. I think, as Andy said, it's not about whether you hurt other people...whether you're a Christian or not is a personal thing. |
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| davidb | Posted: 12.02.2003, 15:22 | |
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>>If you are feeling that God doesn't exist then trusting in him that everything will be okay is not only contraditory but foolish... That's right - that's why these sort of doubts are so disheartening, isn't it. I do feel for you - I know how unpleasant this sort of thing can be. All the best in your sifting through what you feel and think. We do care. Very best wishes, DavidB |
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| Anonymous | Posted: 02.03.2003, 12:22 | |
| Unregistered User |
As the 'Girlfriend' mentioned in Darkly's posts I feel I should write something on this. I know - I'm a slow on the uptake. Darkly recently told me about this way he was feeling - I had guessed a portion of it, but after 4 years together - you would have thought it shouldn't be such a surprise to me (not that he has always felt like this - just that our closeness etc should not have allowed me not to have realised the seriousness of the situ...) So as you can imagine - I feel lost, let down etc and all of the things that Darkly is worried about. I have no idea what _I_ can do to help - unfortunately - this is all so weighted - not only is a person close to me going through a really hard time but also - how does this affect our future... There are so many more parts to it that I can't even go into (mainly my own selfishness etc though). Guess I'd just really appreciate prayer for myself as well as him so that _we_ can help _him_ through it. And if anyone has any advice about what I can do - please help... Darkly's Girlfriend. |
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| Anonymous | Posted: 02.03.2003, 18:02 | |
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Hey D Firstly thanks for your honesty, we are not very good at saying we are struggling with stuff - frightened of what people may think of us. But it is only by looking at what you are thinking and feeling that you can work through this. Try and identify what it is that has changed, what has broken down, what or who has let you down, and why this has made you feel like you do. Also what would change your mind, what would convince you that God was real, that he loves and cares for you. If you don't think that, what would life be like without that belief system in your life. No-one has all the answers, but you sound like you are loved by friends and your girlfriend. Try and talk to one person who won't give you glib answers but will listen. B To girlfriend, I suggest what is important is to love, listen and pray and ask a trusted friend to support you too. |
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| andy | Posted: 03.03.2003, 13:33 | |
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Just to say still thinking and praying for you Dx |
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| davidb | Posted: 03.03.2003, 23:50 | |
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Yes, thinking and praying for you both, D and D's girlfriend - I'm really so sorry that you're both going through this difficult time. Love, DavidB |
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| darkly | Posted: 05.03.2003, 01:57 | |
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Andy, As I have already posted somewhere tonight: Thanks for the chat. B, hi. Nice to see a new face around here. Why don't you register and let us know a bit anout yourself - or not, no pressure. Well, I had better get to bed. Up earlyish tomorrow. night |
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| Bernie | Posted: 06.03.2003, 21:15 | |
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Thank you for the kind welcome. I have been perusing the site for a few weeks but feel brave enough to register so there's no going back now. Just a few random facts in no particular order, I am going skiing in a few weeks time, never have before - will probably come back black and blue. I love abseiling and would love to abseil off the Clifton bridge in Bristol. I love Jack Daniels and Coke. Hope things are a bit more sorted for you D B
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| darkly | Posted: 06.03.2003, 22:31 | |
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Bernie, Hi, Mint-choc Icecream... Well, each to thjeir own I guess - My fav is something nutty -  I don't feel as stressed as I did before. Had a good chat with andy the other night which help sort out some feelings and idenify issues. I still don't know how I feel as yet but knowing I am not the first and seeing that it is not all bad is a great help. I used to abseil when I was younger - loved it. I'm much more of a vodka and coke kinda guy. Enjoy your trip and make sure you tell us all about it when you get back. |
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| davidb | Posted: 11.03.2003, 14:56 | |
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I can't imagine JD&Coke; I'll have to try that sometime. Vodka & Coke is nice, although there has to be plenty of coke to mask the vodka, which I'm not keen on the taste of... Hi to everyone here, hope your weeks are going OK. I felt awful yesterday about Christianity amongst other things - just feeling totally drained. I'm feeling more energetic today, though. |
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| Midge | Posted: 12.03.2003, 00:10 | |
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Hello Bernie! Nice to hear from/about you. > Hi, Mint-choc Icecream... Did I miss something? Oh I see - the userinfo page. I was thinking about that a few days ago - it should have sections for 'special powers' and things like that. I think my special power would be morbidness... Dx - glad you're a bit better now and that Andy's been looking after you. We'll keep praying for you  davidb - I like your &Coke; code - I'm surprised that hasn't been seized on yet to encode a can symbol. Sorry to hear you weren't so good yesterday - you can always phone me and I'll share your misery and drainedness I'm still hanging on by my toe-nails. Managed to lead a Bible study this evening on how the Holy Spirit guides us, which I wasn't up for last week - it was on Acts 16, where the Holy Spirit does a lot of obstructing (as well as door-opening) when Paul et al are trying to serve God. We all felt reassured. Felt too drowsy to do much else today. Managed to operate the overhead projector in Sunday morning's service after a night of not sleeping and not getting up in time to have any breakfast or coffee, though I felt a bit odd. Even coped with the complicated overheads for "Who wants to be a baptismillionaire?" The evening service on the end of Romans 8 was amazing, and my feverishness just added to its effect. They had to drop 'Oh love that wilt not let me go' through lack of time, but it was still great!! Re: Coke & stuff - I'd much rather have red wine & coke like they have in Hungary, though it never tastes quite as good here. I've got an aversion to vodka after an unpleasant 'Russian party' I experienced. I must big-up the single malts tho at this juncture. Sorry for rambling - I'll go and tuck myself up in bed now for a good rest / feverish Kafkaesque night. |
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| davidb | Posted: 12.03.2003, 14:11 | |
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>>davidb - I like your &Coke; code Eh? |
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| darkly | Posted: 12.03.2003, 22:38 | |
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davidb, Midge means have a line or drinks called &Coke. You couls have a variaty of flavours - Vodka, JD, etc. I really should have typed Vodka and Dr Pepper, as that is my fav drink. Dx |
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